N to Z, salad. 

All else will be provided.   Yes, Bring the Kids - but above all, BE THERE!

Back to today.  PP RON LYSTER led us in the Pledge. GREGG ELLIOTT and PP STEVE DAY combined to lead us in God Bless America, with STEVE reminding us all what a significant day this is in our modern history.  LEO TSENG gave the Invocation, and in honor of 9/ll, asked that we stand while he spoke.  He first asked that we remember the families of the victims, and asked that they replace any hatred they may still feel with compassionate forgiveness.  We pray for the brave men and women in the military, who put their lives on the line in our behalf.  We should be proud of them.  Let us always be one nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all.  Well done, LEO.

TONY MARRONE reported there were no visiting Rotarians - nor any other visitors, but we did warmly applaud the many spouses who were with us.   Pres. PETER then described some high-powered gadget he had just acquired, which was a Palm Pilot, a computer, telephone, digital camera, with GPS - everything, apparently, except for fax transmission (which, they tell me, is on the way out, anyway).  I think it was MARK BLOCK who asked him what it cost - $499.  LEE DUNAYER is sporting a new Blackberry, which does some of the same things, and goes for a bargain $500 even.

We were reminded of all the great visuals which PP DAVE WHITEHEAD provides, and Pres. PETER then noted that since he had forgotten to thank DAVE for ourterrific Club Assembly video, he was fining himself!  The amount will be the same as RUDY ALVAREZ'S multiple fine of last week, which I think cameto 500 big ones.  Gadzooks, PETER, this is a dangerous precedent - butwe do thank you for the dough!

MIKE YOUSEM was asked if the Holiday Shopping spree was on, and he replied that it was set for the second Thursday in December, the 11th.  Save that date, please.  This announcement brought up the subject of money, so Pres. PETER had this question:

If money doesn't grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?  And in the medical line, Why do doctors leave the room while you change? - they're going to see you naked anyway! And if a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call? (Boy, I'm glad I have PETER'S notes - I can never figure out whether to use who or whom.)  And last among these conundrums (Is this educational or what?)  Why are you IN a movie, but ON TV.  Finally, in honor of our visiting spouses, Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
This last effort produced considerable animated response, of course.

SALLY BRANT introduced our Speaker, Magician James Warren.  As some indication of his success, he has been invited back to perform at the Magic Castle every year for the past TEN years!  Over that same period, he has spoken to over 200,000 California middle and high school students regarding the dangers of smoking and drugs.  Trade shows that want to attract crowds to their booth often hire him.  He delivers keynote talks on "Teamwork" and "The Magic of Creativity."  And, no surprise, you might be ableto book him to perform at your next party - claims he does this purely for fun and money=E2=80=A6
While he is an expert in sleight-of-hand, he presently focuses more on the mind than the hand.

James began with a question - "How many believe you got where you are today by your own efforts?" - and not a hand was raised.  He wasn't surprised- after all, we wouldn't dare make that claim on Spouses Day!  He soonpicked on PP STEVE SCHERER, pointing him out by saying "You're the One".  James then noted that if you took seven decks of cards, plus one joker, you would have 365 cards - one for each day of the year.
He showed us his list of which card matches which date, asked STEVE what date he had in mind, and STEVE said June 7th.  Before he could proceed, LENNY FRIEDMAN couldn't resist interjecting "You'll be as surprised as we are", alluding to the fact that James was about to name the card that matched STEVE'S date.  Yes, it was the ten of diamonds! 

He then offered us his biggest secret!  Turned out to be that you had to think of your audience as a team, and make them all stars.  The Ace of Spades is the most popular card, and for some reason, STEVE spoke up again, saying "I'm the One".  James said he was about to name STEVE'S card, and he did - called it Fred (so there!). He showed us a book entitled 'Math Without Fear', claiming that it changed his life - he wasn't afraid of math anymore.  PP ERIC LOBERG could no longer restrain himself, so blurted out, "What are the winning Lottery numbers?"  James pointed out that if he could predict that, he wouldn't be talking to us today. 

James asked for some keys - and, purely in the interest of proving that thiswas all on the up-and-up, I offered him one of mine, along with five other providers.  Placed in a sack, he had six pigeons in the audience each take out a key, being sure not to show it to anyone.  His plan was to ask each one who had a key if they had the red key he had earlier marked.  They in turn were to respond, Yes, I have the key (or something similar).

By their response, James planned to deduce who did, indeed, HAVE the marked key.  His first trip around the six got him started, but on the second round, when he came to LEO TSENG, he slipped up!  LEO did indeed have the key, and James was surprised.  Someone asked him afterward if that had ever happened before, and he said it was the first time he had missed!
He passed out some paperbacks, and asked someone to read the top word on a random page, and then, mentally, use it in a sentence.  When they gave the sentence, he immediately picked out the word "disregard"!  Next he had someone read a paragraph, to themselves, and he began to figure out what it was about. It contained images, concrete images, and had bright colors, he was theorizing.  Sure enough, there was a woman wearing a bright yellow blouse!  Last up was FLOYD DEWHIRST, who was asked to find a big word and concentrate on the first letter of that word.  First, James thought it might be s, no, L - yes, next letter was O, no- U, yes - LOUDSPEAKER!

Beats me - he put on quite a show.  Thank you, James.

YOE, Ernie Wolfe